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Grandpa Q reports black skies ahead

Oldest surviving Seeker sends sixth report from interstellar space.

Foundation’s monthly statistics:  still rising

Oversight body hails latest figures as evidence that an Encounter is just around the corner.

I’m going down, says Seeker veteran

Glorban Asquant says next trip will be deep into the planet’s core.

Foundation’s new computer system still offline

Chief Executive defends decision to source from the military and claims activation ‘imminent’.

Orcus Brank Tiry, spokesman for the Outreach Foundation, will today announce that the number of Encounter expeditions is increasing exponentially.  ‘Those who predicted that people would be put off by poor initial results have been proved wrong,’ he said.  ‘Qualterns remain as committed to making an Encounter real as our founder, Jency Burnwhist, was nearly 150 years ago.  He gave his life to the cause, just as the thousands of willing Encountrists today continue to do.  Or at least we think they do.  Who knows?’

Kart Priant, acting chair of public comment group Cynical About Everything, was not impressed.  ‘“Poor initial results” isn’t calling the glass half full, it’s pretending there’s something in the glass when it’s completely empty.  Since the Outreach Foundation assumed its self-appointed role of promoter and monitor of these suicidal attempts to find aliens, almost half a million people have died, and how many aliens have been “encountered”?  None.  The government only tolerates their activities because the death taxes come in handy.’

‘The CAE are just a bunch of moaners,’ said the Outreach Foundation’s latest recruit earlier today.  ‘Seeking Encounters is the noblest pursuit there is, and I’ve been waiting all my life for this.’  18 year old Blastern Dry was speaking from the Foundation’s main zap pad, where he was waiting to be transported to his Encounterpoint of choice:  the heart of Quint.  When asked if he wasn’t discouraged that this was a popular choice which has been tried by hundreds over the years without apparent success, he was undeterred.  ‘It’s got to be Quint, hasn’t it,’ he beamed.  ‘Biggest, oldest sun, right in the heart of the SunSystem.  I’m going in slightly off-centre, hoping for an entry in orbit around an alien civilisation in the sun’s dead centre!  I can’t wait.’

Foundation’s monthly statistics:  still rising